The Wedding

I was minding my own business in a corner of the little building, right near my little hole in the wall. It was a nice place to live, because it was quiet (except for one day a week, when a crowd of people gathered to listen to a boring little old man speak) and the windows were colorful,letting in nice light. I liked to curl up just behind the baseboard, and take a mid-afternoon nap every day before i settled in for the evening.Today, however, a crowd filtered in and rudely disturbed my peaceful rest. I was frustrated, because the same crowd was typically not due back for a week, and they had come yesterday as well. Before my very eyes, men in horrid black suits, and women in distasteful dresses had filtered in through the doors, and had begun to sit down in the seats. The organ lady had nearly stepped on me, as she made her way to the organ, and had proceeded to bang out some of the most awful sounds I had ever heard. A ridiculously dressed woman, in a white sack had flounced up the aisle between all of the benches and was now standing hand in hand with a terribly ugly man who kept scratching his nose. My whiskers twitched in annoyance; who did these clowns think they were? I ventured out a little further, trying to decide what to do. I couldn't decide whether to let them finish their little celebration, or shoo them out of my home. After I had put up with an old lady sneezing all over my favorite prayer book, and a brat stealing some candles from a side table where i loved to sit, I made my decision. I would scare these freaks out and they would never come back. But no, I thought to myself; my mother rat had always told me to be polite. So, with that in mind, I sauntered out on my hind legs, onto the steps in front of the altar. I strutted proudly across my stage, and came to a halt in the center of the steps, right in front of the podium. Knowing that the humans were no doubt awed by my powerful presence, I raised my claws high into the air, and put an immediate stop to the preaching going on behind me with a high squeak. "Ladies and gentlemen," I began grandly, but I was cut off by a screech. "Raaaaaaat!!!" It was the little hag who had sneezed. Raising my claw indignantly, I was about to put a stop to the terrible noise coming out of her mouth. Then I heard a slight shuffling behind me; glancing over my shoulder, I saw the priest running after me with his heavy book. "Good," I squeaked, "finish her!" But, suddenly, the old man flipped the book high above his head, and brought it down as hard as his skinny little arms could muster. I dodged his frail attempt easily. Putting my paws on my hips, I scolded him, "She's over there, stupid!!" But as soon as the words had left my lips, he brought the book down again, and everything went black....